Membership in the Religious Society of Friends

The following statement is intended as a guide for people who are considering becoming members of the Religious Society of Friends (Quakers or Friends) and who will be making their application through the Durham Monthly Meeting. Since each Friends Meeting may consider membership in a slightly different manner, there are consequently somewhat different expectations regarding the membership application process. The following statement speaks to the particular expectations for membership in the Durham Monthly Meeting and outlines the process for becoming a member of Durham Monthly Meeting and the Religious Society of Friends. We encourage individuals to consider becoming members as soon as they may feel led to take this step.

Expectations of Membership

While both regular attenders and members of the Durham Meeting are encouraged to participate fully in the life of the Meeting, members are considered to have made a special commitment to the Meeting and to the Religious Society of Friends. Such a commitment indicates a serious and profound choice of a spiritual community in which value is placed on the community's nurturance of the individual and on the individual's growth through a long-term commitment to that community.

Members are expected to take responsibility for the functioning of the Meeting in a number of ways. Principal among these is the necessity to be aware of the spiritual, financial, and corporal needs of the Meeting and to offer to do what is needed. Friends have traditionally chosen not to rely on a “hireling'' minister, but instead are convinced of the value of the concerned ministry of all members of the Meeting, knowing that growth comes from active participation. Membership implies financial and time contributions as resources permit to assist in the continued flowering of the spiritual community.

Membership for Children

Children of parents who are members of the Meeting may be listed as Family Members if the parents so request. As such, these children come under the care of the Meeting community and remain so until either the parents' membership is transferred or withdrawn, the child reaches age twenty-one, or the child receives membership as outlined below. Children whose parents request Family Membership status upon the birth of the child may be referred to as Birthright Members.

The Membership Process

The steps required for becoming a member of the Durham Monthly Meeting of the Religious Society of Friends are briefly outlined as follows:

· Initially, the person wishing to become a member writes a letter to the Clerk of the Meeting stating her or his desire to become a member. Such letters are often a simple brief statement, but equally often may contain some of the feelings or reasons which lie behind the person's desire for membership. Letters which are received from couples are welcome, but are acted upon separately for each individual.

· Upon receipt of a letter requesting membership, the Clerk will bring the request to the next monthly meeting for business and a Committee for Clearness will be appointed to meet with each person requesting membership. Typically, three or four Durham Friends are named by the business meeting to such committees. It is important that at least one person, if possible, be named to the committee who knows the applicant well. The applicant may also be asked to suggest members from the Meeting whom s/he would particularly like to serve on the committee. Membership is not a requirement for inclusion on a membership Clearness Committee, but each Committee should include at least two members of Durham Monthly Meeting. [Language added after brochure was published in italics.]

· The Committee for Clearness will meet initially with the applicant to discuss the meaning of membership in Durham Meeting, and to explore the meaning of membership for that individual. Normally a decision about membership will not be made at that meeting. Typically a second meeting will be called for further exploration with the applicant, and a decision about membership may be made at that time or at subsequent meetings. Clearness Committee members should feel free to meet without the applicant at any time during the decision-making process. [This is a revision of wording in the brochure on membership.]

· The principal concern is that there should be sufficient time and a sufficient number of meetings to arrive at a consensus regarding whether to recommend the applicant for membership to Meeting for Business. [New text.]

· Upon completion of their meeting(s) with the person requesting membership, the Clearness Committee will report to the next monthly meeting for business recommending that the person be accepted as a member, or that additional time be allowed to facilitate a further readiness. When the meeting for business acts on the report of the Clearness Committee to accept a person as a member, the person's name will be added to the Meeting's membership list and forwarded to the Yearly Meeting for recording. In addition, it has been the custom at Durham Meeting for the Oversight Committee to appoint a Welcoming Committee to allow more Friends to become better acquainted with the new member.

Readiness for Membership

Becoming a member of the Durham Meeting is a process that may take some time. The person desiring to become a member will meet with a Committee for Clearness whose role is not to pass judgment on the prospective member, but rather to assist the person in the process of spiritual seeking which will result in the clear leading that membership is the right step for the growth of the individual and for the life of the Meeting.

Some areas of consideration that will likely be explored by the prospective member and the Clearness Committee during the course of their meetings are listed below in query form. These queries in no way imply that there are set standards of knowledge or certain beliefs to which an applicant must subscribe. It is, however, the expectation that the Committee for Clearness and the prospective member will seek clarity together regarding the rightness of membership in the context of these queries as they relate to the individual and the Durham Meeting.

In order to learn more about Friends, their practices and beliefs, prospective members are encouraged to engage themselves in discussion with knowledgeable Friends in the Meeting, to borrow and read various pamphlets and books, and to attend some of the programs or retreats sponsored by area Friends. In addition to the meeting library and the libraries of meeting members, sources of current Quaker reading material are given in the Appendix.

Suggested Queries for Persons Requesting Membership

1. Do you have some understanding of the history of the Society of Friends, and of the current affiliations of Durham Monthly Meeting?

2. Are you familiar with the traditional Friends' “testimonies” on race, sex, pacifism, and simplicity and can you relate these to Friends' interpretations of the Christian message? Do you have a sense of how Durham Meeting is similar to and different from other Quaker Meetings?

3. Are you familiar with the practices in Durham Meeting regarding vocal ministry, and with the conduct of meeting for worship with attention to business? Are you aware of the assumptions behind these practices? Are you acquainted with the committee structure in Durham Meeting?

4. Are you aware of the Faith and Practice of our Yearly Meeting and are you comfortable with its contents? [Faith and Practice – Book of Discipline of the North Carolina Yearly Meeting (Conservative) of the Religious Society of Friends, 1983 Revision.]

5. Has the period of acquaintance occurred of sufficient duration and depth so that both you and a significant number of Meeting members can feel confident in your understanding and knowledge of each other?

6. Finally, and most importantly, what has led you to desire membership? Have you examined your desire to apply for membership in the light of your spiritual leading and religious conviction? What does this membership in the Society of Friends mean to you and to your understanding of your relationship to this monthly meeting?

Source: Brochure, “Membership in the Durham Monthly Meeting”, first published by the meeting in 198_. Two sections are omitted in this version: Transfer of Membership, and Sojourning Members. Notes following italicized text indicate revised or inserted wording.